OK, so congress is all about this SOPA/PIPA thing, so we should be prepared here at OMGTRU. Here's a list of things you need to be prepared for/with in the case of internet meltdown:
Tornado Sticks: The government will have "overreaching, due process-circumventing powers to shut down entire websites based on the mere suspicion that they might contain infringing material." So, we need to fight back with the only weapon known to destroy "the government overreaching, due process-circumventing powers to shut down entire websites based on the mere suspicion that they might contain infringing material." Tornado are available everywhere, man. Boom.
Slide-whistles: Humans can't resist a good laugh. When we steal cat pics and the government comes to shut us down, we can have some humorous items handy. "Even before the bill has come to vote, censorship shenanigans have already been demonstrated by Universal, who fraudulently removed a music video by Will.i.am that voiced opposition to SOPA." If YouTube had some slide whistles and oversized pants/suspenders, who knows what could have happened?
Lawyers: My sis' fiancee is a lawyer, so that's a thing. "it's really not hyperbolic to say that this is the worst nightmare of a democratic and stable internet." Nothing says nightmare like a just-graduated law student taking on the government and lobbyists. Did anyone see The Rainmaker?
Y2K Jokes: When nothing happens and everything is moderately unaffected, we can always fall back on some sweet Y2K jokes.
Burning Cars: Or we can burn some cars in protest bro.
Water: We'll need plenty of water since we're gonna run off of Tor and Tor "is what some would call a darknet, a network that runs under the radar of the normal internet and can only be accessed using special client software." It's gonna be hot in Tor. And we all know what Bruton looks like in the heat.
TORMGTRU: A Tor-based omgtru will have to keep us alive. Sustenance, Jopy. Are you prepared?
DNS Energon Cubes: Seems like this whole thing comes down to DNS and its importance. So we should stock up on DNS energon cubes for when the shit hits the proverbial fan. If we get enough, we could be the only site left on Tor after awhile. That's our ticket to the big-time, being the only game in town. Luckily, the Transformers never came and Energon is usually found in open factory spaces, unprotected despite its importance:
Spider sledgehammers: "All in all, the options are either incredibly obtuse, risky or likely to become illegal anyway. But one thing is for certain: SOPA and PROTECT-IP's 'killing spiders with a sledgehammer' strategy isn't going to smash piracy--it's just going to make the internet a lot messier." If we just get these bros some spider sledgehammers, everything will go away, right? Right? I mean the lawmakers know what they are doing, right?
Free-time: We'll have a lot of that, certainly.
Source
Tornado Sticks: The government will have "overreaching, due process-circumventing powers to shut down entire websites based on the mere suspicion that they might contain infringing material." So, we need to fight back with the only weapon known to destroy "the government overreaching, due process-circumventing powers to shut down entire websites based on the mere suspicion that they might contain infringing material." Tornado are available everywhere, man. Boom.
Slide-whistles: Humans can't resist a good laugh. When we steal cat pics and the government comes to shut us down, we can have some humorous items handy. "Even before the bill has come to vote, censorship shenanigans have already been demonstrated by Universal, who fraudulently removed a music video by Will.i.am that voiced opposition to SOPA." If YouTube had some slide whistles and oversized pants/suspenders, who knows what could have happened?
Lawyers: My sis' fiancee is a lawyer, so that's a thing. "it's really not hyperbolic to say that this is the worst nightmare of a democratic and stable internet." Nothing says nightmare like a just-graduated law student taking on the government and lobbyists. Did anyone see The Rainmaker?
Y2K Jokes: When nothing happens and everything is moderately unaffected, we can always fall back on some sweet Y2K jokes.
Burning Cars: Or we can burn some cars in protest bro.
Water: We'll need plenty of water since we're gonna run off of Tor and Tor "is what some would call a darknet, a network that runs under the radar of the normal internet and can only be accessed using special client software." It's gonna be hot in Tor. And we all know what Bruton looks like in the heat.
TORMGTRU: A Tor-based omgtru will have to keep us alive. Sustenance, Jopy. Are you prepared?
DNS Energon Cubes: Seems like this whole thing comes down to DNS and its importance. So we should stock up on DNS energon cubes for when the shit hits the proverbial fan. If we get enough, we could be the only site left on Tor after awhile. That's our ticket to the big-time, being the only game in town. Luckily, the Transformers never came and Energon is usually found in open factory spaces, unprotected despite its importance:
Spider sledgehammers: "All in all, the options are either incredibly obtuse, risky or likely to become illegal anyway. But one thing is for certain: SOPA and PROTECT-IP's 'killing spiders with a sledgehammer' strategy isn't going to smash piracy--it's just going to make the internet a lot messier." If we just get these bros some spider sledgehammers, everything will go away, right? Right? I mean the lawmakers know what they are doing, right?
Free-time: We'll have a lot of that, certainly.
Source
