sitting at my house watching "barefoot contessa" i think she's making garlic bread. sandra lee already did this like four hours ago. oh this one's on the grill, that's different. yeah so in other news i've been unemployed for like four months now

my roommate is writing a song called "(something about me makes) beyonce crazy" it's a real r. kelly-style ballad

it's in the initial lyric-forming stages right now

randy was supposed to be here at 4:30, where is he his phone isn't working

hey guys speaking of beyonce, has anyone seen Obsessed? it's on netflix streaming and i keep meaning to check it out. although ever since idris elba was charles minor on "The Office" he's become less of a sympathetic character in my eyes

i watched the remake of The Taking Of Pelham 123 yesterday, it was really crappy. i recommend the original version though. who doesn't like walter matthau??

oh god she's putting capers in this salad capers are disgusting

so i'm twittering now @drunkguytweetin, i'd like your suggestions for celebrities to harass. ludacris is completely unresponsive so far. legendary durham, nc news anchor larry stogner also failed to respond to my inquiries.

wtf is up with google image search now, they've completely fucked this whole thing up

i was watching Class Act the other night, hey guys remember Karyn Parsons? she was hot!

how has everyone's summer been so far? mine has sucked! it's really hot and humid here all the time makes the sweat man go

the instrumental to "trapped in the closet" by r. kelly is really impressive

randy is officially one hour late

i'd really like to try these pretzel m&ms, i don't usually buy m&ms but in fact the other night i bought a packet of peanut ones because i prefer those to the regular kind. there has to be a filling in the m&ms, you see, because the regular ones are just a bit too chocolatey for my taste and i prefer a balance. i was thinking that a puffed rice m&m would be good, and now that makes me think that actually a marshmallow and chocolate m&m would be even better. how about a marshmallow, graham cracker and chocolate m&m? it'd be like a s'more m&m. i should be working at the m&ms labs, this shit is gold.

new idea: gold-filled m&ms

fuck there's an m&ms store in times square

i think the neelys (from "Down Home with the Neelys") have a healthy marriage

i don't like these cake programs, i just don't. i'm not afraid to say it

you guys shark week is coming up soon

one time in college i was really drunk so i went to the grocery store and i was thinking, "ok, you're an adult, you can buy anything you like. what's something you really like?" and i pondered maybe some count chocula cereal but i never really liked that. so then i thought how about some archway cookies and milk because i never ever even think of buying those.

i ended up buying a box of nilla wafers and barfing them up at dawn. i don't even like nilla wafers. i do like lorna doones though.

paula deen is making something that looks exactly like a charred jabba the hut surrounded by pineapple slices

randy is now 95 minutes late

randys here dudes

dudes don't sleep on that alton brown/mario batali slash fiction

paul, science only allows so many m&m combinations

hey guys what's going on in this thread

i tried to find out if they had them in l.a. and i'm pretty sure i just befriended pretzel m&m's on facebook

guys as someone who has eaten these and loves chocolate-covered pretzels and m&m's i can honestly say they're ok but not really worth seeking out.

hey th

money well spent